So, you all know how I'm always right, yeah?
Well, this one has made me smile
I had the old steel bar fencing changed for new glass panels. We moved the whole fence line further away from the pool, made the enclosure bigger and incorporated a new pool house too.
THEN, we realised we needed planning permit for that.....
Anyway, it got the councils hackles up, as we've thought outside the box and have a funky layout that incorporates the pool house as a part of the fence. We also used parts of the old steel fence on the higher ground to act as part pool fence, part chicken enclosure.
It works superbly and looks great.
But the council have stalled and cajoled and squirmed without giving planning permit, for 18 months.
We've jumped through a million hoops and have always met their requirements, but still they find a new reason to refuse permit.
Now, as I'm given to arcing up when provoked, I've simply delegated a lot of the admin to my perfect wife (I'm the luckiest guy I know).
But still, they persist with stupid bureaucracy.
The last thing has been the steps to the pool house.... they say the glass fence isn't strong enough to be a handrail as per AS blah blah......
So, my poor exasperated wife started to get antsy....
so I wrote this......
"Dear Sir/madam (I know its a Sir)
Maybe you people get your mums ( I met the guy once, definite mummys' boy) to wash your tape measures in the hot wash a few too many times, for having studied (googled) the standard required, I find the glass fence meets every requirement possible.
The hand rail is not required for steps below 1m height, so I think you've made some of the most basic errors possible.
I'm just a grease monkey mechanic, but my tape measure isn't rubber. I find the highest step to be 875mm and the pool house floor to be 975mm from the ground.
So, rather than removing the steps and screwing the door shut permanently as you request, how about you come and measure up again?"
Yours sincerely (very, and I know you shouldn't use Sir and sincerely together)
Anyway.... 48 hrs later... permit issued
No apology yet though, but I'll push for one.
I can't stand useless people. And I particularly dislike having to tell "experts" how to do their job... what am I paying them for???